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FITNESS TIP: Set a regular gym schedule that`s easy to keep up with. For example, I work out once every 4 years after I vote for president.
Who´s up for Candyland? $20 buy in
I suspect the ancient Greeks would be horrified that we refer to `laying on a couch all weekend watching a TV series` as a "marathon"…
The WWF advert asks, “When the ice goes, where do the polar bears go?” ... Well, swimming, I suppose.
My theory on housework is, if the item doesn´t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be.
Do one thing every day that scares you. Or one thing that scares other people.
If I hit snooze 3 times it should automatically send an email to my boss saying I`ll be out sick.
What if God is a woman. Not only will I be going to Hell, but I`ll never hear the end of it.
It`s not you, it`s me. I just don`t like myself when I`m around you.
You say I’m not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I’m not cold, I’m hot. I know I’m hot. Thanks for embracing it.
There’s nothing like having a long to-do list to make me feel like doing absolutely nothing.
It`s a bird.. it`s a plane..no wait..it`s a blade of grass....
What`s the hold up on making extremely heavy shoes for toddlers so they can`t run around so much?
My stove top knob reads, LO | 2 | 4 | 6 | 8 | 10 | HI......so what is Med-High, Medium Low?...They just need to lay it out for me in numbers! Like "set stove top to 8." no wait, 9.? Food manufacturerers and stove manufactuerers need to get toghether on this! So let me see,..... (me thinking)....if ten is high...5 is medium that means 7.5..... WAIT!.....low would be 0 so HI would be 12???....WTF!!! forget about simmer!........HEY KIDS! WHO WANTS PIZZA!
`Google`` must be a woman, because it knows everything.