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Transformation Tuesday! Throwback Thursday! Flashback Friday! Never underestimate a woman`s ability to find a reason to post a selfie.
You girls are lucky, tampons are changing the end from a string to a bit of tinsel but its only for the Christmas period
I`ll never become mature enough to not laugh out loud when the person in the stall next to me farts so loud it sounds like a volcano just erupted.
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it.
Whenever I delete an App on my iPhone, The shaking icons make me feel like they`re all panicked over who`s getting deleted.
Picture a scavenger hunt where the only items on the list are "your house keys" and "your house." Well, son, that`s what drinking is like.
I think it`s about time Taylor Swift wrote a song called "Maybe I`m the Problem"
I can`t possibly f*ck up the entire universe, so that`s a relief.
Don’t bother looking up “impose.” It’s next to impossible.
I hate it when I fill my blowup doll with helium and then she plays hard to get...
Coca Cola: Because drinking black water seems like a solid life choice.
If I ever get arrested I am going to ask for a status update instead of a phone call.
Does running out of money count as exercise?
Scientists are saying that social media is making us less accepting and more aggressive. Whatever, a$$holes!
The Spanish version of the Subway jingle “65.63 Peso 0.3 meter largo” isn’t quite as catchy…