Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Any psycho girls wanna hang out? Just text me like 5000 times and let me know.
Before I lose my phone, end up naked, high, drunk and/or possibly arrested, I would like to wish you all a Happy Friday.
If you read your timeline backwards it is about a person who hates everything and gradually becomes happier until they get a life.
the difference between people and celebreties ...... celebreties don`t have a routine
you know what sucks about being a "chubby guy"....when your girlfriend wants to play with YOUR boobs :)
English = Hello. Spanish = Hola. French = Bonjour. Japanese = Konnichiwa. Chinese = Nî Hâo. Italian = Ciao. Me = Sup B*tches.
I don`t know why friends and family keep getting pregnant when I have two kids right here they can have.
Just found out I`m pregnant. At least that`s what this expectant mother sign for my parking spot says.
We should not have trusted anything Charlotte wrote in her web. She was consistently talking out of her ass.
I wish these people who sing songs on the radio would learn the words to the song, they keep messing me up!!
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
Famous words from Fergie... "Boom Boom Pow!" Happy 4th of July!!
The light does go out in the fridge ... Now I have to wait for someone to let me out.
change your birthday on facebook to today, see how many people say happy birthday for APRIL FOOLS!!!! lol
Lets all take a minute and realize the lack of creativity in the name "fire place"