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Maybe teenagers just aren`t strong enough yet to remove the sticker from their hat
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I went to the store and saw that Duracell batteries were on sale just before Valentine`s Day. Someone is a marketing genius.
When I see names carved into a tree I don’t think it’s cute, I just think its strange how many people take knives on a date.
That kid looks like me. Somebody should warn him.
I`m trying to locate a girl from high school. You know, the one who could tie a cherry stem with her tongue.
I like how Sesame Street just casually has a vampire hanging around.
just watched my first full episode of jersey shore... #ashamed of new entertainment
Why don`t strip clubs do Black Friday? It would be the one place I would camp out to go in.
This year rather than candy for your valentine why not liquor instead.
There are two rules to success in life - 1. Don`t tell people everything you know
The first guy who made fire by rubbing two sticks together probably did a lot of other weird sh!t.
The first five days after the weekend are always the toughest.
Sometimes when you first meet someone you just know you want to spend the rest of your life ... Avoiding them
My favorite part of The Notebook is when I turned it off and watched Terminator 3 instead.