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wonders how you can knock sense into someone when you`re beating them senseless?
Saw my Ex with some guy at a bar last night... so I ordered a beer, took a few sips then gave her date the rest of my drink... Walked away.
I’m probably single because I forgot to forward those chain messages from 2008.
My parents would hide fruit roll ups on top of the refrigerator, where I couldn`t reach them. Then leave chemicals right under the sink.
Doing some caroling! All by myself. In people`s backyards. In the bushes. Very little singing. Mostly watching. -Bfanch
If there is one-thing in this would i don`t like being thought is ... a lesson.
Getting to places would be so much easier if I had a helicopter.
You call them “cuss words.” I choose to call them “sentence enhancers.”
Women have closets full of `I have nothing to wear.`
Sociologists say that social media is creating the laziest generation ever. I expressed my opinion in great detail by hitting the “Like” button.
Love is like a rubber band, we keep pulling, someone let’s it go, and it hurts the one who held on.
I wonder if anyone has watched Storage Wars and said, "Hey, that`s my stuff!"?
Just bent over to pick up a beer that rolled out of the fridge and realized yoga is exhausting
Asian gangs, also known as study groups...
If other employees are taking four fifteen minutes smoke break a day, I should most certainly be allowed a one hour nap time.