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So, basically Alexa is just some know-it-all with no actual job skills.
It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
Why periods? Why can`t Mother Nature just text me and be like, "Whaddup Girl?, You ain`t pregnant. Have a great week. Talk to ya next month."
So far my Christmas shopping has involved buying myself presents, so I’d say it’s been a success.
Life Rule #17: Always hold out your hand when someone is counting money in front of you, ...just incase.
I was planning to do something today, but I haven’t finished doing nothing from yesterday.
Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and they live for 150 years. Lesson learned.
If Starbucks delivered, I would be a morning person.
My only trick for looking younger, is when an 80`s song comes on I try to look completely confused and slightly disgusted.
Alcohol doesn`t get people drunk, people get people drunk. Drunk people get other drunk people extra drunk.
I`ve noticed that the squirrels are gathering nuts for the winter. Couple of my friends are missing...
I love the gym this time of year. The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model.
You`re only young once but you can be immature forever!
I dream about naps.
I will literally spend $20 on food but won’t buy a $20 shirt.