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Apparently getting injured while in the KISS Army doesn`t make you eligible for V.A. benefits.
Welcome to my Facebook wall. Straight jackets are on your left, meds are on the table, and if you hurry, you can still get a seat in group therapy . . . have fun!
I ate cereal for dinner because I do what I want. I`m an adult. Oh did I say adult? I meant poor. It`s because I`m poor.
At the end of the day, it`s 11:59pm.
My tombstone will read I should have googled it first.
Does it count as saving someone`s life if you just refrain from killing them?
You girls are lucky, tampons are changing the end from a string to a bit of tinsel but its only for the Christmas period
There are so many scams on the Internet now these days, but for $19.95 I can show you how to avoid them.
I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.
When people ask how my childhood was, I say "Pretty good, so far."
Please, please don`t be a bitch to me. Because then I`ll have to be a bitch back and I can do it better than you.
Your baby has no idea that you threw him a 1st birthday party. All you did was inconvenience your friends.
The only b word you should call a woman is beautiful. B!tches love to be called beautiful.
How long are Winnie the Pooh and Tigger going to ignore the fact there`s something seriously wrong with Eeyore
First rule of Pizza club, you don’t share it.