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I don`t wanna make this weird but that`s just kinda how I do things.
I’m not paranoid, but everyone thinks I am.
Beer and a 44 magnum with an everclear shot makes everything good like Nintendo
Taking shots of Tequila is just another way of saying, "I like where I wake up to always be a surprise."
Sorry I wasn’t ignoring you I was just watching 7 seasons and 54 episodes of this new show I found.
When I`m older, I`m going to buy one of those Volkswagen Bugs. Only because I have a excuse to hit my wife every time we go somewhere.
I don`t think the lady who just shushed a baby in the library knows how babies work
Cinderella is my favorite fairy tale about how foot size is the best way to recognize someone.
is confused. Oh wait, maybe not.
My kids will be mad at me when they discover it isn’t illegal to talk in the car while I’m driving.
Happy 4/21! National work drug testing day!
You don`t even want to know the things I have done for a Klondike Bar...
Feeling a little sassy today...But then again, that`s everyday
Earlier this morning, I was invited to join an XXX Facebook group. I was somewhat intrigued until I realized it was a group for guys who like to wear really really big shirts.
"Stop, Drop, and Roll" is not JUST an effective fire safety technique, but also a very memorable way of getting out of a boring conversation. :P