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Most of being an adult is marveling at the date and saying how fast the year is going by.
in 2014 there were times when I annoyed you, disturbed you, irritated you and bugged the hell out of you. Today i wanna let you know that i planned to continue with it this year :-)
I had a blind date once, her name was ..::..::.:::::…:::::
Facebook needs a "settle down" button.. You tap on a friend`s profile, that locks them out for a day so they can work through stuff privately..
Every once in a while I check up on people I hate to make sure I still hate them… I do.
Everyone talks about leaving a better planet for our kids. Let`s try to leave better kids for our planet.
Shout out to all the ladies at church today in the same clothes from the club last night.
You say I’m not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I’m not cold, I’m hot. I know I’m hot. Thanks for embracing it.
The list of things I won’t eat if covered in chocolate gets smaller everyday.
Not to brag, but Netflix recommends certain movies just for me.
life is too short to match socks
When Miley is naked & licks a hammer it’s “art” & “music” ... but when I do it, I`m “wasted” & “have to leave Home Depot"
Its all fun and games until someone drinks the beer with the cigarette butts in it..
In other news millions of facebook user suddenly got their law degree
Weekends will from now on begin on Wednesday because that is when it should truly begin!