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That amazing moment when you find money in your clothes that you forgot was there.
If life Sucks, what makes you think death doesn`t Blow??
It should cost $10 to leave someone a voicemail.
Ways to get to my heart: 1) food ... that’s pretty much it
According to a recent survey, 98% of people responded with "Go away."
If life is unfair to everyone, doesn`t that make life fair?
Every time I think I finally have the life I always dreamed of....I wake up.
Look Bruce, just because you call it the "Batcave" doesn`t change the fact that you still live in your parents basement.
I don`t know about you....but I have thought about running away from home way more as an adult than I ever did as a kid.
I once shot a man with a paintball gun just to watch him dye.
Relationship status: Private. The only way for it to be.
Nobody tell my husband that "year round periods" aren`t a thing.
is procastinating now. Don´t see why I should put it off.
You say hangover. I say out of booze.
To help reduce cost, this status was typed in china.