Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Who says nothing is impossible. I´ve been doing nothing for years.
I wish I could feel as happy as an adult, as I felt as a kid when the teacher wheeled in the TV during class
The best thing about not being with you, is not being with you.
The irony of social media is that the majority of users are all alone.
The black sheep always have the best stories.
Your eyes are so beautiful. If you look deep enough i can see my own reflection...
People with multiple personalities should donate one of them to people who don’t have one.
Cant imagine the look on Obamas face when he saw `Olympus Has Fallen`..His next quote would have been.."No more Taiwans in the secret Elevetor office"
Why do people say “nice to meet you” before I’ve even said anything? How do you know it’s nice to meet me? I’m a jerk.
No one is as ugly as their driver`s license, and nobody is attractive as their profile picture.
I`ll bet I`m the only one in this grocery store with "sh!t for tacos" on my shopping list.
If someone tells you `I love you` but you don`t feel the same way and don`t wanna make it awkward just say `I love YouTube` really really fast :)
Everytime I see a person jogging I already know they have facebook, everyone on facebook works out.
Missed connection: you were washing your car in a bathing suit. I rode past your house 78 times. You threw a rock at me.
Is it too early to start drinking? - some moron with a clock.