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It`s real cute how pedestrians confuse "right of way" with immortality.
I think the next Star Wars movie should go Country! I would be excited to see Garth Vader.........
Job interview: Please tell us why you’d love to work for us? ME: I need money :)
My definition of" Armed and Dangerous" is: a pissed off wife with a bottle of wine, and the credit cards.
I hate mixed messages. They`re great.
I`m happy that my grandma thinks that a iPad is for wet and leaking eyes
If I drunk text you and you`re sleeping, don`t text me in the morning. That ship has sailed.
If the shoe fits, wear it. Unless they`re not yours. But you can still were them. It`s just a road test, after all.
The smaller the town, the bigger the sex cult.
If you touch your phone in the right places, a pizza will arrive at your door.
The two major causes of depression are: a) having a job, and b) not having a job.
Birds do it. Bees do it. Heck, even fleas do it. Let`s do it! Let`s live in a homeless man`s beard!
"Did you know that life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate?"
I wonder how the Never-ending story is doing.
If I was just learning English and you told me a sport called BOXING takes place in a SQUARE area called a RING, I`d probably give up.