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The pill is the second best thing women can put in their mouths to prevent pregnancy.
Just made a bunch of money by standing outside a party and charging $3 to enter ... I don`t even know who`s party it was!
I accidentally spilled spot remover on my dog and now he’s gone.
In the United States a man gets kicked in the groin every 6.2 seconds. I would hate to be that man.
Shopping at the Dollar Tree makes me feel rich and poor at the same time
When you screw up, menopause can be a wonderful excuse for stupid things you do or say!!!
Fart jokes ain`t funny, they stink.
Life was much easier when apples and blackberries were fruits&& not phones
Well, THAT Jehovah`s Witness isn`t going to forget anytime soon what they witnessed when I answered the door.
Does the 5 second rule apply to soup? Please answer quickly!
FUN FACT: I can fit 17 Pringles in my mouth. SAD FACT: I tried to figure out how many Pringles I could fit in my mouth.
After a certain point, the `F` on the thermometer no longer stands for Fahrenheit.
Obesity: When you buy a hula-hoop and it fits you.
When I was a kid, I thought quicksand was going to be a much bigger problem than it really is.
Sometimes you just need to do something stupid while sober so that people will leave you alone about your drinking.