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Do Starbucks employees take coffee breaks?
My car doesn’t have a passenger airbag but don’t worry, if we get in an accident all the McDonalds napkins in the glove box will cushion you
I never owned a telescope, but it`s something that I`m thinking of looking into.
I need to stop making things more complicated than they need to be. I`m adding that to my bucket Power Point presentation.
Sometimes it`s easy to forget we would all violently murder each other if we couldn`t obtain basic food or water. Have a great day guys.
It`s all fun and games...unless there`s cookies, then it`s serious
It`s never going to work out between Mario and the Princess. Most of the time she`s on a whole other level.
Good for you, people that do things.
Wish there were more love songs about naps and liqour.
I just heard a woodpecker call me a `paranoid old weirdo` in morse code.
The longer a Woman takes to get ready, the easier it is to piss her off.. it`s Science
Cactuses are just heavily armed cucumbers.
To the individual who sat outside in their car, across the street from our house, at 530 am and had Led Zepplens Immigrant Song blaring at full volume, I have one thing to say to you! AWESOME CHOICE DUDE!!!!!!!
I love strapping my kids into their car seats. It’s the closest I can legally come to putting them in straitjackets.
I have blank business cards I hand out and call them my “none of your business” cards.