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All I`m saying is if guys were meant to make them, they`d be call sandWIZARDS.
Had a blast doing my Black Friday tradition!!!! I slept!
After watching copious amounts of crime dramas I`ve come to the conclusion that serial killers only target women who wear matching bra and pantie sets. Feeling much safer now.
Wish my girlfriend was awake, could really do with a sandwich right now.
I hate how homeless people shake their coin cups at me. I get it. No need to gloat that they have more money than me.
Donuts: An excuse to eat cake for breakfast.
Watch out! It’s quite possible some of my best mistakes haven’t been made yet.
I just went into an AOL chat room to ask someone how to start a fire with sticks.
I think I will stick to my old fashioned pepper shaker. This new pepper spray tastes terrible on my potatoes...
I`d go to church if they had Wi-Fi.
I don`t even know why chicks spend so much time and money on their hair when all guys look at is their tits.
I wonder if monsters ever get scared that we might be hiding under their bed?
Just heard a lady say "When in doubt, get a pizza"... I don`t know who this woman is but she`s my new life coach.
Sometimes in life you have to give the people around you a little push ... into traffic.
I’m usually that person who has no idea what’s going on.