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Your french fries are just my french fries on the wrong plate.
The problem with this generation boils down to this one thing: Their cartoons suck.
Note to Self: In future interviews, don`t say "Safe in your strong arms" when the employer asks where I see myself in 5 years.
Why do we offer "a word to the wise" when it`s the stupid ones that need the advice?
Facebook account for sale, Friends included...
Once you have to start paying a babysitter every time you go out, you realize most friendships aren`t worth it.
I wasn`t going to get so many groceries, but there was a new girl working today and she took my check.
Give a man a fish & he`ll eat for a day. Give a man a jelly fish and you can pee on him.
If you`re going to be original, be prepared to be copied.
Just heard someone pronounce the H in wheel so I`m gonna need a minute
Love your neighbor. But don`t get caught.
To all my friends who sent me best wishes for 2013, for 2014 could you please send money, alcohol or petrol vouchers…Cheers!
"I love you unconditionally*." -God *certain terms and conditions apply. See Bible for more details.
Building the city on rock and roll was probably the wrong move from an engineering perspective.
Most bags of sand live a tough life stopping floods. But some, the lucky ones, live a leisurely life tied to the basket of a hot air balloon