Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
As a man, EVERY month is `Breast Awareness Month` for me.
I just had a conversation with my-self...but it just turned into an argument. I think it`s that time of the month...
Let`s talk about how fabulous u think I am.
If you can`t handle me at my worst...I don`t blame you, neither can I.
To whom it may concern: I need more money and power ... ASAP thanks!
Caterpillars have the ideal life. They eat a lot and then sleep for a while and wake up beautiful.
If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.
Never underestimate the power of a hug. Or a slap upside the head. Whatever works.
Who named them veterinarians and not "dogtors"?
You are the pebble in my shoe of people
(Apocalyptic world) "Well guys......there goes our last female"
My dog acts like her entire family was murdered by a vacuum cleaner.
Google image results are like a party that starts off exactly how you expected and gets weirder the longer you stay.
Nobody cleans a house faster than a man expecting to get laid.
If you’re a douchebag, it’s so easy to find the right hat.