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Geez. I make one little mistake and my pharmacist now adds "by mouth" on the prescription label.
I wonder what "don`t touch" is in Braille.
It`s hard to make your coffee when you haven`t had your coffee.
If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN
I want to grow my own food but no one makes pizza seeds.
That disappointing moment when you pull up to work and it`s not fully engulfed in fire.
Do they have to play movies so loud at the theatre? I litterally have to scream into my phone.
There was a HUGE spider in the shower.. So I ran into the living room screaming naked.. Now my daughters` friends probably won`t be allowed over anymore..
Do you think when Spider-Man gets stoned with Batman and the Hulk he sometimes thinks the spider on his chest is real and freaks out?
I’m glad MTV has shows like Teen Mom 3 so girls have good role models besides Miley.
I just found out that his full name is actually, Vehicle Identification Number Diesel.
I always read my girlfriend’s horoscope to see what kind of day I`m going to have.
My wife just changed here facebook status from "Married" to "widowed", should I be scared?
Every time I make plans to eat better I can hear my stomach laughing
Noise canceling toilets should be a thing.