Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Life is very funny, if you take the time to watch it.
My new years resolution was to lose 30 pounds by the end of summer. I`ve only got 40 pounds to go.
Mythbusters is basically my childhood with a much larger explosives budget.
Down on yourself for being lazy? Keep in mind the Greeks believed their GODS lived atop a very hikeable mountain and no one went to check.
What do they give the person that has everything? antibiotics
Am I getting older or is the supermarket starting to play some great songs?
That awkward moment when you`re telling the truth, but start laughing like crazy and everyone thinks you`re lying.
Pizza: 73% delicious, 27% also delicious.
Money can’t buy you happiness? Well, poverty can’t buy you anything.
Whenever I feel all alone in the world, I remind myself that I`m a valued customer at several grocery stores.
The correct term for gluten-free, sugarless, vegan brownies is "compost."
I mean, I don`t even call it a hangover anymore. It`s just morning.
Nothing is quite as scary as hearing your doorbell ring on the same night you made a blood sacrifice to the dark lord.
I want to take this moment to thank the depends adult diaper company for allowing me to play my video game for a strait 8 hours uninterupted...
thinks that 100-calorie packs have just enough cookies to piss me off!!