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If you watched a person cut a piece of wood, would that be sawed or seen?
I just want to read, have a snack, then take a nap. Basically, I just want to be in kindergarten again.
Whenever I open my fridge, my dog looks at me with a puzzled look and he thinks: Why don’t you eat all the food?
I think Tampax and Hershey`s should get together and offer a super pack....
I’d like to hang out, but that would get in the way of me being home and doing absolutely nothing.
If you like to make love while listeninag to music, always choose live album. ..That way you`ll get an applause every 3 to 4 minutes. :)
When I see a man with long fingernails, my first thought is wizard. My second thought is virgin wizard.
In space they just call it "Jam"
I like how Sesame Street just casually has a vampire hanging around.
Whoever said you can`t "like" your own status is just not awesome enough to do it.
Taught a man how to buy fish ... So much easier.
I didn`t think a McDonald`s Happy Meal would fill me up, but it did...OMG, I ATE THE TOY!
Of course I like you, I gave you that roofie didn`t I?
Tried to donate blood today but they had too many questions about where I got it.
Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be totally impossible!