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Redneck Word : debate...i was gonna go fishin today but forgot to bring debate
I`m going to start carrying fireworks in my car because sometimes my horn just isn`t enough.
I miss flip phones because at the end of a conversation you could always dramatically close them like, bitch whatever.
Why are people with BAD breath always wanting to tell me a secret?
If my glass is half full then I start wondering where my bartender is.
When I found out my toaster wasn`t waterproof, I was shocked!
My favorite part of country music is the part where I change the station.
If I`ve learned anything from these ghost hunter shows, it’s that everyone speaks English after they die.
Anything can be considered your job if you hate it enough.
Why do we only crave what`s bad for us? Alcohol, deep fried food, cake... You never hear anyone say "I`d kill for some salad."
According to serving sizes tonight, I`m a family of 4.
Never go to bed angry. Stay awake and plot revenge.
Do you smoke? Smokers: "Yes." Non-Smokers: "Never have, never will." Stoners: "Smoke what?"
Friending someone on Facebook and complaining about what they post is like phoning someone to tell them you don’t want to talk to them.
I`m pretty sober, but I`m prettier drunk.