Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My Christmas tree smells like pine, and is hanging from the shift lever in my car.
Share this if you are weird and don`t care
There was a sense of accomplishment finishing the daily newspaper. I literally have no idea when I`m supposed to stop reading the internet.
I have decided I no longer want to be an adult. So if anyone needs me, I`ll be in my blankey fort... coloring.
I ignored your Facebook friend request because there isn`t a "Hell no!" button.
After four karate lessons, I can now break a two-inch board with my cast.
My 12 step program means parking closer to the bar.
People think I`m crazy because I talk to my cat. What am I supposed to do? Just ignore him when he asks me a question?
HR and I apparently disagree on what "debriefed" means.
If you aren`t sure if you like someone, here`s a test: imagine they`re dead. Now, was it an accident or did you murder them?
Autocorrect changed "you`re so wise" to "you`re so wide", and now I need to find a good hiding spot before my wife comes home.
You`re really cute, can I suck the life out of you? - women
She texted me: "Your adorable.". I replied: "No, you`re adorable." Now she thinks I like her. All I did was point out her typo!
That moment when being uncool, is cool
Putting ketchup on steak should also affect your credit score.