Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sometimes I speak in a different font but no one ever notices.
Cashiers are always checking me out.
Iām in a long distance relationship. Sure, some people refer to it as a restraining order, but still.
When I`m on my death bed, I want my last words to be...."I left 10 million dollars in the..........."
Why does `beans` only mean secret when it`s "Don`t spill the beans?" Why can`t I say I have a dirty little beans to tell you?
Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40.
People who say watching golf on TV is boring have obviously never listened to golf on the radio
i wonder if fish get thirsty .
When you`re a kid, you hate those moments when there is absolutely nothing to do. As an adult, you live for them.
Secret Web Cam Test: Please nod your head yes if you can read this.
Doing some caroling! All by myself. In people`s backyards. In the bushes. Very little singing. Mostly watching.
That tenth doctor is a selfish idiot, he never recommends anything!
Single Awareness Day ..... it`s a S.A.D. day
I`ve been single for a while and I have to say, it`s going very well. Like... It`s working out. I think I`m the one.
Bill Gates: A billi a billi a billi JayZ: Half billi half billi half billi Lil Wayne: A milli a milli a milli Me: A dollar a dollar a dollar