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Almost time for my nightly foursome......... Me, my bed, my pillow and my blanket! What the hell were YOU thinkin` you perv!!!!!!
Lake Superior really needs to lose the attitude.
Dogs lick each other`s butts to tell each other they like them. Just like politicians
Who let the owls out?? Don`t sing the chorus you`ll make it worse.
Hey! Wanna make $$$$$$ fast? Just follow my simple instructions. 1:Hold down the Shift key 2:Press the number 4 six times. It’s that easy.
When I was your age, we had to walk ten miles in the snow to get drunk and have s€x.
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That’s almost $21.00 in dog money.
We`re all mature until somebody brings out the bubble-wrap...
Hey guys with your phone in a hip holster, is it because your purse is too full with tampons?
I haven`t been this disappointed since I first saw a real hedgehog and it wasn`t blue.
Legalizing same sex marriage. I thought all sex was the same after marriage.
Life is just better when you’re laughing.
Some people are too chipper early in the morning. They don`t realize how bad it is for their health.....until I`m choking them
Your so old, you knew Burger King when he was a prince.
In fact, yes, l can multitask. I can screw up several things at once.