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The story of George Washington chopping down the cherry tree is my favorite tale of honesty, integrity, and giving a child an ax
Why didn`t Spider-Man`s enemies just move to a city without skyscrapers?
“I went to Jared” I whispered as she slowly opened the velvety box of Subway coupons.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark
I thought I was having déjà vu, but it turns out I do the exact same things every day.
Having children is a fantastic source of free labor.
Sometimes I take a bath because it’s hard to drink wine in the shower.
Friends with benefits? What, like you can provide dental insurance?
The Push Up ice cream company should just buy out Pringles and make all of our lives easier.
I`m a multi-taking procrastinator. I can put off all kinds of things all at once.
For those who know nothing of how to satisfy a woman: The G spot is located at the end of the word shopping.
I need to learn the rules to make sure I don`t accidently follow them
Any guy can seem cool on a motorcycle. If you really want to know what kind of man you`ve got, watch him walk through a spider web.
Sometimes I can`t figure out if I`m in pre-school... high school.. oh wait, I`m at work.
Being handed a flyer is the offline version of a pop-up ad.