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Old meaning of sorry. "I won`t do it again." New meaning of sorry. "Damn I got caught, next time I need to be more careful."
We are the only ones who can control our own happiness, but sometimes it feels like someone else is holding the remote.
One thing I`ll never understand is alcohol free wine
loves driving down the road and just waving at random people like you know them!:D
If I owned a copy store I would only hire identical twins.
One of my female friend is reading a book called "Learn to drive in a week" for the last 3 years.
For Christmas I just want summer...
I think you people lied to me...exactly how much of this hair of the dog do I have to eat before this hangover goes away?
Real friends show me their boobs
ever notice that on a phone the word "mom" is 666?
My bank statement is just a visual record of bad decisions.
People that use big words, but not in the right context, are just trying to be ambidextrous
Fun Fact: Valentine`s Day was created by a woman than didn`t get what she wanted for Christmas.
It’s interesting how the ads on Youtube never have trouble buffering.
The early bird gets the worm! So does the late bird. They all get worms all the time; there`s tons of those things. Relax, there will always be a lota worms......