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Lazy is a very strong word, I like to call it βselective participation.β
What doesn`t kill you makes you stronger. Except for bears. Bears will kill you.
I just awesomed all over the place.
I was sitting in traffic the other day. Thatβs probably why I got run over.
It`s great how you have legs that can take you away from a conversation when you don`t feel like listening to people anymore
Eat whatever you want,and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight ...Eat them too..!
Kinda surprised I`m not an action figure by now.
The hardest question of the weekend.. can or bottle?
I just got a paper cut opening a box of Pop Tarts. There will be no more fancy breakfasts around here.
You might call it βwhipped.β I call it `guy whoβs getting laid.β
if your looking for love sorry to disappoint you im already in a relationship with fun and freedom. :-)
Lower your expectations and I will totally amaze you.
Just another day of not being rich and famous.
dreams of a better world... where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned
Chuck E Cheese: Because it`s never too early to introduce your children to gambling and bad nutrition.