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*Financial Status* Just rinsed off a paper plate...
I`d say I`m not a morning person but I`m really not sure I`m an evening person either.
Most advanced telescopes use mirrors so we really have no way to know how many vampires are in space
Stalking is when two people go for a long romantic walk together but only one of them knows about it.
Stop complaining about being single!!, we have bigger problems here. Like why McDonalds don`t serve breakfast after 10:30 -.-
There is no angry way to say `bubbles.`
Girl says to her Blonde friend, I slept with a Brazilian man last night. The Blonde replies: OMG you SLUT! How many is a Brazilian??
Don`t think I didn`t notice that you deleted your status when no one Liked it.
If you work on a farm and your job is to take care of chickens, you are a chicken tender.
Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown man child who can`t take care of himself.
I think I can survive on Mars since they found water for my coffee.
Ladies, I hate to break this to you, but curves and rolls are not the same thing.
I have good taste, I just don`t have the money to prove it.
It`s kind of creepy that you noticed me staring at you.
I`m thinking of making a sax tape to make myself well known like some of the bad boys and girls do...does it matter if I can`t play it?