Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You can really scare someone when you yell "Peek-a-boo!". Especially when they`re trying on clothes in the fitting room.
My doctor asked me if I drink to excess. I told him I would drink to anything.
went to see the conjuring, and now there`s 10 crosses, four bibles, and a poster of Chuck Norris in my room.
United Airlines.... Board as Doctor, leave as patient.
You never hear skinny people saying, "I`m just small boned."
I always push when I should pull. I have doorlexia.
Ladies: Sometimes you just need to throw your arms up in the air and say, "Tie me up"
Common sense is so rare it should be classified as a super power
It’s a good job Apple isn’t in charge of New Year. We’d all be expecting 2015 and get 2014S instead.
Not so great minds also think alike.
If I had a dollar for every time someone has told me to "grow up," I could probably afford a whole arsenal of Super Soakers.
3 out of 4 Americans make up 75% of the population.
It`s 2013. With all the hormones in food and advances in medical technology, why are there still girls with less than C cup boobs?
My misery likes tequila, not company.
I test drove a car last month. Apparently, you`re not supposed to keep the car for a month. At least that what this cop is telling me.