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What if Egyptians actually had a written language, then started using emojis, and that’s all that’s left?
To the guys complaining about lack of sex from their woman: supply & demand. Supply better product, they`ll demand it more. -Bfanch
I`ll do a lot of things for money, but I draw the line at working...
You never realize what you have till its gone... Toilet paper is a good example.
FYI: Push-up bras don`t actually help you do more push-ups :(
Finding friends with the same mental disorder as you ... Priceless
"Rise and shine” is probably the most depressing thing a shoeshiner hears in the morning.
If your talking behind my back then guess what? Your in a pretty good position to kiss my a$$!!!!
My wife told me that her favorite position is when I lay very very still wearing a toe tag and she starts dating again
Families should be able to trade people, just like professional sports teams.
My original account got suspended for aggressive behavior and they haven`t even seen me in bed yet.
You can usually judge a women`s hotness by how many times your girlfriend calls her a whore.
You`ll all be sorry when I figure out how to breathe fire.
I would unfriend you but I enjoy laughing at your life.
I`m thinking of making a sax tape to make myself well known like some of the bad boys and girls do...does it matter if I can`t play it?