Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You call it being sober. I call it on my way to the liquor store.
Just been informed that my spirit animal is Eeyore.
Checking the time on your phone twice because you were`nt paying attention the first time
Every cigarette you smoke takes 5 minutes off your student loan debt.
I think...therefore, I am.....single
Just saw a cop that had a U-Haul pulled over on the side of the road. Obviously he was trying to bust a move.
I like it here because not only do I get to air out my dirty laundry, I get to see yours too.
Kinda like Facebook, I wish I could ‘hide’ people in real life.
YouTube is so addicting, I click on a music video and next thing you know I`m watching how to make ice cream.
After a night of heavily drinkin` there`s one thing I can`t stand...and that`s up.
Vaginas are like the weather. When it`s wet, it`s time to go inside.
Whenever I see a celebrity photobomb, I`m like, that`s so relatable. I too constantly ruin moments and think I`m more fun than I actually am
You couldn`t handle five minutes in my head.
If you boil a clown, do you get laughing stock?
The voices in my head are not real, but they have good ideas.