Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`m not a Dr. or a Nutritionist, but I`m pretty sure the worst thing you can put into any high fat/ high calorie dish is your fork.
I like having an ex ...it gives me something to do on Facebook at 3 in the morning.
Take mentos and freeze into ice cubes. Put the ice cubes in your friend’s drink. After five minutes their drink will randomly explode.
I really can’t kick ass, but I’m super good at taking names!
If Apple really want to introduce something new and "innovative" they should just release a longer charger.
We`re all mature until somebody brings out the bubble-wrap...
Getting back with your ex is pretty much the same as taking a shower, getting out, and putting back on the same old dirty underwear.
My girlfriend told me I`m starting to annoy her because I relate everything to batman... What a joker!
Don’t judge me for things I did a few seconds ago, I’ve changed since then.
Hey, sorry I missed your call. I saw your name on the caller ID and I didn’t want to ruin my day by talking to you.
I`ve got big plans for the weekend. If things go well, come Monday morning I`m gonna need a chiropractor, a psychiatrist, a priest and bail money.
Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.
Me, a morning person? Pfft. Most days I`m not even an afternoon person.
If you needed to wear camouflage in a gingerbread house, would you wear ginger snaps?
Some tattoo artists need to just say, "no, I`m not doing this sh!t."