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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Well, if you count Elmer Fudd singing "Kill the Wabbit" then yes, I do like opera.
Got kicked out of the local casino again. Apparently, gold chocolate coins mess up their slot machines or something.
I`m only 2 girls short of a threesome.
Behind every beautiful song is a person who really shouldn`t sing it out loud in public
One day, I`m gonna wait for the Wal-Mart greeter to go on a bathroom break, step in their place, and begin welcoming everyone to K-mart.
I`m thinkin` Dodgeball........... but with random people..........who don`t know they are playing.............
My friend told me that bigamy was having one wife to many. I thought that was called monogamy.
Just so I`m sure to make friends, I like to walk in the bar carrying a handful of phone chargers.
I would like to be a Disney Princess...You know, where I have random animals showing up to help with the housework!
Actually according to chemists, alcohol IS a solution…
this isn`t the status you`re looking for
For just 3 cents a day, all of my followers can help me quit my job...
The naked truth, is always better than someone’s best dressed lie.
To settle an argument, think about why you are wrong and why she has boobs.
A guy had his whole left side torn off, the doctor said he`s all right.