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I swear that logging in to Facebook has become the equivalent of opening the fridge door and staring inside even though you`re not hungry.
Unfortunately, showing that much cleavage doesn`t fix your face.
Cubic Zirconium`s slogan should be: Guys can fake it too!
Sorry I wasn’t ignoring you I was just watching 7 seasons and 54 episodes of this new show I found.
"2 weeks with my baby xoxoxo" lol,calm down romeo&juliet.
I took my family to Sea World this weekend, but i wasnt allowed in. Apparently you cant take your fishing rod.
I`m just a guy standing in front of a huge pile of laundry wondering how flammable it is.
why do people with bad teeth always have a smile on there face
A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s…That’s because she changes it more often.
I am convinced God only created six days and the devil added Monday.
I ate 4 cans of alphabet soup, and just took probably the biggest vowel movement ever
My Status updates are so great people hit the like button twice
My last relationship was almost as complicated as the knot my pocket created with my headphones.
Nothing embarrasses a psychic more that throwing them a surprise party.
When you introduce clapping to your dancing you might probably be too old to be in a night club at 1am.