Daily Silly Status

I never got the expression "complete idiot". Is there an Incomplete version?

How many facebook friends do you have that if they posted "I`m depressed and on the edge", your first thought would be to poke them?

My new bumper sticker ... "Watch out for the idiot behind me!"

Sometimes I`ll catch my reflection in a mirror and I`ll be like, "oh no, that can`t be right."

Remember the good ole days when we had to get out of bed to use the Internet.

You`re an intellectual who doesn`t read books? I completely understand because I`m an athlete that rarely moves.

I`m sorry. I know I said hi, but I wasn`t really prepared for any follow-up conversation.

Retirement plans compared .. If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00. With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1000. With WorldCom, you would have less than $5.00 left. If you had purchased $1000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock you would have $49.00 left. If you had purchased United Airlines, you would have nothing left. But, if you had purchased $1000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for recycl

*spits out animal cracker* This doesn`t even taste like hippo.

I wish I had a job where I could punch stupid motherf*ckers in the face all day.

Gone insane. Be back Tuesday.

Do Hostess employees have Snowball fights?

If I had a crystal ball to see 5 years in the future, I would have 2020 vision.

I do what I want, when I want, where I want.. if my mom says its ok. :)

I felt really mischievous earlier so I bought a McDonalds and ate it at a KFC