Daily Silly Status

Bring multiple sets of clothes to work, change every hour, and act like nothing’s different.

Hell is an endless cycle of getting comfortable in bed & then suddenly having to pee.

"Trust me, you can dance." -Vodka

Thank goodness I`m loud and obnoxious all the time, so my family can`t blame it on the alcohol.

A walk of shame is always sad. Don`t make it worse by adding the sound of Flip flops to it.

"Nineteen letters long" is 19 letters long.

Let`s be honest, we all have someone on Facebook we wanna bang...with a pan.

Grabbing a drink after work is perfectly fine.However, you look like an alcoholic when your getting that drink at 6am.

When I find it, I don’t need it. When I need it, I can’t find it…

I don`t understand why Walmart has a problem with me bringing my dog in the store. He`s better behaved, smells better, and less likely to take a crap on the floor than 95% of the people here

Did the Baha Men ever find their dogs? Did they put up posters or just sing that song?

i wonder if fish get thirsty .

I`m not sure who`s more drunk, me or the guy wrapped in Christmas lights standing in the mirror.

If you are not sweating while doing it...then you are doing it wrong.

Live each day like someone else is paying for drinks