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Is it rude to throw breath mints in someones mouth while they`re talking?
Things I`ve learned: There`s no cool way to chase after a bouncing ping-pong ball.
I beat my chess opponent in less than five moves with the chair I was sitting on!
No PornHub, I would NOT like to share this video with my friends and family on Facebook.
My kids wanna have a water balloon fight later, I just got done putting mine in the freezer... Wanna bet I win...
I`ve decided that I`m an ass man. Don`t get me wrong, horses are beautiful. They just aren`t as cute as donkeys.
I spent at least half an hour trying to get my girlfriends bra off. I will never try wearing that again.
Doctor said only clear liquids before surgery. Vodka qualifies right?
You have to wait 30 days to buy a gun but Amazon Prime only takes 2 days to ship live bees, no questions asked.
As I was signing into my email account instead of yahoo.com I typed hayoo.com...nope, it wasn`t right but I got to thinking it would be quite appropriate, afterall, we`re trying to get someone`s attention, right?
There may be two sides to every story, but you’re still a douche in both of them.
What did the crop say to the farmer? Stop picking on me
Please be careful on the roads. Lots of people are drinking exsessively and letting their wives drive.
Can I just drop it like it’s luke warm? It’s been a long day and I’m tired.