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If someone is uncomfortable watching you masturbate they; A. Have intimacy issues B. Are frigid C. Should sit somewhere else on the bus
Everyday I’m shoveling. – Winter 2014
Why are people with BAD breath always wanting to tell me a secret?
People who say, “Happy New Year” to you on the 4th of January are not really your friends.
“I” before “E” especially after “P”. Mmmm pie
Why does Flo from Progressive needs to have an apron on to sell insurance. Is there something dirty about insurance we should know about?
Heard Justin Bieber got arrested for drag racing. Sure it`s dangerous, but surely it isn`t against the law to run in high heels...
I got a little package in the mail today. For some reason it just reminded me of my ex.
I`ve always wondered why they don`t have a pregnant Barbie doll? Turns out Ken comes in a different box...
Live For Today… Plan For Tomorrow… Party Tonight!
To hell with the "dislike" button! i think we need a "who cares" button, a "WTF" button and a "STFU!" button. just saying.... Oh and a "lol" button because i just get tired of writing it! lol!
I don’t necessarily believe in karma, but I’m gonna be extra careful crossing the street after this weekend.
I went by the Gym today. Its the third time this week............. One of these day`s I might actually go in.
Adulthood is basically sadness and paying bills.
BOOK FACT: If you took every book at Barnes and Noble and laid them end to end you get thrown out by security and banned from returning.