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When we are small, our mom`s would use really small forks as spoons to feed us...But what about Chinese moms? Would they use toothpicks?
I hate when I’m about to hug someone really sexy and then my face hits the mirror.
How could a man who is covered in tattoos be afraid of commitment?
The older I get the more I understand Squidward`s anger.
Woke up this morning, looked in the mirror & said out loud, "You gotta bring it today!" ... So I packed a lunch and went to work.
What kind of jerk makes an anti-anxiety pill difficult to break in half?
The grass was greener on the other side, so we smoked it.
Hmmm… Who should I stalk on Facebook now? :)
4 out of 5 voices in my head think the other voice is a douche.
Driving to work would be so much better if I didn’t always end up at work.
Monday :`( Tuesday :-( Wednesday :- Thursday :-/ Friday :-| Saturday :-) Sunday B-)
Stop procrastinating. Join Hokey Pokey Anonymous today and turn that life around!
I just read an article about the dangers of drinking that scared the crap out of me. That`s it. No more reading!
I haven`t seen any new Bigfoot pictures in a while... I hope he`s OK.
The sun and I have an understanding. He gets up before I do.