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Getting married at 22 sounds alot like leaving the party at 9:30
I love how stars are billions of miles apart and we`re like "that`s a soup ladle".
Why do I get the feeling that a lot of you are using Facebook as a substitution for prescription meds?
Just saw the little boy next door licking whip cream off the cat. Pretty sure he heard something he shouldn`t have.
I regret nothing but mostly because I can`t remember most of the stuff I should probably regret
I`ll be a morning person when it`s Christmas.
is currently amending my "Who gets money" list when I win the lottery ... who has something nice to say?
Nothing says "I`m unemployed" like wishing for snow on Facebook.
I`m going to stand outside, so if anyone asks I am outstanding.
One of the best uses I`ve ever found for invisible ink is when I signed my marriage license with it.
You can tell a lot about a woman by the way she cuts your brake lines.
You can lead a horse to water but I`d rather ride it to the liquor store.
I would like my FB friends to know that the opinions and comments I make on FB in no way reflect the actual thoughts, opinions or actions of me, or my family. Its all for fun. The only posts that I actually mean are the same ones you agree with.
The hardest thing about my juice cleanse is trying to juice Snickers
OK so i have an idea ............... wait why are you all running away?