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I just love having sex with you...Next time I hope you are there with me.
At a four way stop, it`s obvious that the vehicle bearing the most duct tape goes first.
I clean my house like everyone else ... 5 minutes before someone comes over.
Girls are like guitars: easy to strum, hard to tune
Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pac Man, for 25 cents that bitch would swallow balls til she died!
I have never walked toward the exit of a supermarket without nervously wondering if I`ve stolen something.
I know alcohol isn`t the answer, but it`s my best guess.
Go to China on honeymoon. Get intimate with Husband. Tell child that they were "Made in China."
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
I hope my last words aren’t “What does this thing do?”
Whenever I give money to the homeless, I get yelled at that "they are just gonna buy booze with it". All I can think is ... Oh like I wasn`t ..
Sometimes, I`m offended at how easily offended some people get.
Men who claim women belong in the kitchen definitely do not know what to do with them in the bedroom!
You could pleasure me just by walking away.
"Be yourself" is about the worst advice you can give some people.