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You`re only limited by your own imagination! And money. And talent. And genetics. And time. And other people. Go for it!
Roses are red Your thong is pink Cover that up You`re not as hot as you think.
Receptionist: "The doctor will see you now." Invisible Man: "Finally, a cure!"
The bible says you can`t buy your way into heaven but there isn`t a church in the country that won`t encourage you to try.
I`ve set my "life goals" to stuff I`ve already done so literally every day now I`m overachieving. It`s all about perspective.
"Do not touch" must be one of the scariest things to read in braille
Remember, laughter is the best medicine. Unless you have diarrea.
This status is mine....I licked it.
My legs are so sore from the gym that I almost couldn`t walk to the donut shop.
I would eat a lot more salads if they were made out of pizza.
I`m more of a "the glass is half shattered into a million tiny pieces" person.
I live in a madhouse, ruled by a tiny army, that I made myself
The best part of being single is that you always get to be right.
I`m at my most cardio when I am moving the treadmill into storage
There are weight limits on car seats, airlines, skydiving, military, horseback riding, kayaks, and bikes……how is it there are no weight limit on high heels?