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Of course size matters. No one wants a small pizza
Can`t afford P90X or INSANITY workout videos? Go find a wasp nest and slap the sh!t out of it. Never knew I could shadow box,bicycle kick,and twirl while floating.
Didn`t ya`ll know awkward moments existed before? Damn, its like the Yolocaust all over again...
I just got kicked out of the Zoo! How was I supposed to know that real hippos don`t actually eat marbles?
For once I`d like to see "It`s been a crappy year, mainly cause your were part of it"
The lack of a secret handshake makes me question the strength of our friendship.
Apparently when a trainer asks you why you want to get in shape and you answer "revenge" it will raise a couple eyebrows.
Since smart watches can now read your pulse, there should be a feature that erases your browser history if your heart stops beating...
AOL has been hacked. Users have also been asked to check their Atari settings for possible compromise.
I bet now a lot of doctors are going to be reluctant to respond to “Is there a doctor on the plane?”
I just saved a ton of $ on Christmas presents by discussing politics on FB.
Of course I can keep a secret. It’s the people I tell it to who can’t.
eHarmony has a 24 month plan. How ugly do you have to be to need 2 years to find someone?
So who the heck ever buys the middle grade of gasoline?
The self-driving car should have an "I`m Feeling Lucky" button that drives you to a random location.