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The phrase "don`t take this the wrong way" has zero % success rate
Sadly, I don`t think anyone has Wang Chunged once tonight... :(
The one good thing about an egotist. They don`t talk about other people.
I wish some people`s cardio exercise consisted of running into traffic.
I think the only way I`ll ever be motivated to go to the gym is if I`m in prison.
I don’t know why Tampax and Hershey have not joined forces yet. Taping a pack of Reese’s to a box of tampons could literally save lives.
They say women only use 10% of their anger
“Shh.. Do you hear that?” “What? I heard nothing.” “Exactly, it’s the sound of no one caring.”
this is a status you spent your time reading: sj
CONGRATULATIONS! You are the 13th woman he`s called "beautiful" on Facebook today.
I have high blood pressure, but my dogs don`t. So, from now on I`m only getting upset about squirrels and mailmen.
keep scrolling I`ve got nothing....
PARENTS: your teen may be worshipping Satan. Look for these terms: LOL - Lucifer Our Lord, BRB - Burn Religious Books, TBH - Tell Beelzebub Hi
I thought kegels were like Jewish bagels
Scariest Moment: Flushing the toilet at someone else’s house, and seeing the water rise…