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Please excuse me for talking while you were interrupting.
Finally 21 and now legally able to do things which i have been doing since 15….
Bring multiple sets of clothes to work, change every hour, and act like nothing’s different.
Nothing says "I dont take you seriously" like your dog wagging his tail when you`re yelling at him.
Can only please one person a day. Today isn’t your day
I see your Full House and I raise you 3 episodes of Home Improvement. -Me, not knowing how to play poker, but loving 90`s TV
If it was the other way around, I doubt one cat would take in 23 old ladies.
Wow, I just melted a piece of ice by staring at it. Took a little longer than I thought it would.
Getting back with your ex is pretty much the same as taking a shower, getting out, and putting back on the same old dirty underwear.
"When I grow up, I want to marry a man addicted to video games" ~ No woman ever.
If anyone ever steals my identity, I hope they show it a good time. Take it skydiving. We`ve always wanted to go skydiving.
I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
Thinking " What would happen if the whole world farted at once and a person lit a lighter?"
If the customer is always right, then why isn’t anything for free?
I don`t think I have enough money to find long everlasting love.