Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Don`t let the door hit you on the way out ... Hell, who am I kidding, I hope it hits you and knocks you down the f*cking stairs.
It saddens me to say that after tasting this homemade whiskey/nacho cheese ice cream, I’ve found not all dreams are meant to be followed.
Sorry, I`m in a hurry, lets talk while we walk... You go that way.
You know the road is in bad shape when you drive to the grocery store and your fitbit registers 1,000 steps.
If video games have taught me anything, it`s that you`ll automatically get promoted if you kill your boss.
Dear sneeze, If you`re gonna happen, happen. Don`t put a stupid look on my face and leave
Fun game for parents: Scream in horror the first time your child loses a tooth.
My predictive text dictionary doesn’t have “tsunami”, so if you ever get a text from me that says “trumang” start running.
I wish I could smack the stupid out of people. And if you think this status is about you ... Smack yourself for me!
More funny statuses will be posted here soon
There are two types of people...don`t worry you are not one of them.
Frozen water balloon fights... not a good idea.
When suffering from insomnia I either count sheep or ask my girlfriend how her day was.
Ok Brazil, this would be a time when it`s ok to bite an opponent.
I swear, if Facebook changes their layout one more time, I’m going to post a status update about it & then use their site as much as always.