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You lied....you don`t have a Klondike Bar do ya?
In movies, do actors wear costume underwear? Or underwear from home? The whole thing is confusing. I don`t think I can keep watching movies
There`s nothing better than a nap after a good nights sleep.
Now that Microsoft`s Steve Ballmer has bought the Clippers, I wonder if he will release a new version every few years that we all hate.
I really don`t have time for people that don`t find me hilarious.
I realized I eat too much fast food so I decided I would start cooking for myself. Does anyone here know how to "mcnugget" a chicken?
The best part of waking up is.....wait, I didn`t think this through entirely.
I eat tacos over a tortilla so that way when stuff falls out Boom another taco.
Save water. Shower with me. ;)
Don’t waste electricity. How would you like it if I turned you on and walked away?
Having a mohawk used to mean you were tough. Now it means you’re a 3 year-old with annoying parents.
It`s not paranoia if they really are out to get you.
Didn`t have to do much to end my last relationship...she first told me that "opposites attract"...then a couple of days later she told me i was handsome, kind, smart, funny and loving...
The only thing I have learned so far in this company meeting is that this room has 37 ceiling tiles and 24 fluorescent bulbs.
Wal-Mart: Because going to Target requires a shower.