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Sometimes I get road rage standing in lines.
Kiss her in the middle of her sentence so you don`t have to hear what she`s talking about.
I have no interest in skydiving. I get enough of an adrenaline rush hoping my credit card goes through
How can I love nature when it did this to my hair?
What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ”K” instead of ”OK”?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
llllllloooollllll...........................i saw a donkey on a bike
is wondering why Facebook bothers to give the option of "liking" my own comment? Of course I like my own comments. I´m awesome..
I can`t remember if I have any repressed memories.
So bored at work I can`t even think of something to goggle
I just don`t understand why Flo from Progressive needs to have an apron on to sell car insurance.
It`s not stalking if you love them!
Whenever I receive a text saying bahaha, I like to believe you are a sheep on drugs.
Welcome to fight club..., you may now kiss the bride.
You can always tell if a guy masturbates a lot by looking at his hands. If you look closely, you’ll see a wedding ring.