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If zombies ever do attack just go to Costco, they have walls, years of food and supplies, and zombies can’t get in without a Costco membership.
Change of plans everyone: NOBODY Wang Chung tonight.
What flavor is this Harlem Shake you speak of?
I’m probably single because I forgot to forward those chain messages from 2008.
Ya, Wednesday sucks but… it could be Monday!
Apparently somebody gets stabbed every 52 seconds...sucks to be that guy
AOL has been hacked. Users have also been asked to check their Atari settings for possible compromise.
I think I could be a farmer. Except for the dirt, waking up early, wearing overalls and planting crops. But I wouldn’t mind driving a tractor around.
I overheard 2 girls say there was a creepy dude listening to their conversation.
Once a month, women go completely crazy for about thirty days.
LOL` the biggest lie on the internet.
Drunk is when you feel sophisticated…but can’t pronounce it.
I hate being bi-polar. It`s awesome.
Accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty stomach and now I`m the proud owner of aisle 7.
Just scraped 3 inches of "Mostly Cloudy" off my car.