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My horoscope started with `are you sitting down?`
Is beer cheaper off the kids menu
This skinny girl just told me she "forgets" to eat? Is that possible? I just licked her face in case it`s contagious.
Excessive consumption of alcohol seems like a good idea.
I’m always frank with my sexual partners. Don’t want them knowing my real name.
Whenever I try cleaning my room I either end up making a bigger mess, or just playing with the stuff I thought I lost.
I used to be in a band called "missing cat". You`ve probably seen our poster.
Somethings are best unsaid but my brain to mouth filter has never worked right.
I`d be much more attracted to you if you were much more attractive.
That one-day popularity on Facebook because it’s your birthday.
The first person to see a sunset was probably like well this ain`t good.
Can I apologize in advance for basically everything I will ever do???
You know that old saying? If you seen one woman naked. You want to see all women naked.
What does "it" mean in the sentence "What time is it?"?
I bet Eve bit that apple because she knew she was going to get a bunch of clothes out of it.